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Essay 22:  Jeri Ryan
Time:         Age 46

I have always been in love with TV, movies and the women that inhabit them.  The first movie star I can remember was Raquel Welch.  I put a poster of her on my ceiling from the movie
One Million Years B.C.
so I could gaze upon her before falling asleep.  After Raquel came Farrah Fawcett and her famous poster.  I had a brief fling with Lisa Hartman and Meg Ryan as well.  My current favorite is Jolene Blalock from Star Trek: Enterprise.

The closest I ever came to actually meeting a movie star came some years after we started our own company.  We had purchased some computers from Zeos and Zeos was eventually bought out by Micron.  We had brand loyalty so over a period of several years, we ended up purchasing 20 or 30 computers from the combined brands.  At the time, the PC industry was very competitive and Micron was struggling to find a way to increase their visibility.  They eventually decided to buy a football bowl game.  What had been the Blockbuster Bowl and mutated into the CarQuest Bowl became the MicronPC bowl in December of 1998.  Because we had purchased so many computers, we got an invitation to attend the game as Micron’s guests, complete with a reception in the luxury boxes and a chance to meet the President of the company.  The only thing they didn’t provide was transportation.  Since Wendi and I were going to be in Florida right around that time, we decided it would be fun to go.

We got special passes and got to visit the VIP tent and we were finally ushered up to the penthouse for the gathering.  We got to see a preview of Micron’s new commercial called Anthem starring Jeri Ryan from Star Trek: Voyager.  We got to talk to the President of Micron.  We carried on and on about how much we loved their equipment.  When he asked what we thought they could do to improve their machines, we told him our only complaint was that they used interchangeable plugs for several peripherals and we had burnt out numerous power supplies plugging things into the wrong places.  We told him they ought to color code their plugs.  He said it was a good idea and their very next generation of computers had color-coded plugs.  Now every manufacturer of PCs color-codes their plugs.  I swear we came up with idea.

Anyway, he thanked us for our time, told us to enjoy the game and the public relations director came up to us later and asked us if there was anything else they could do to enhance our MicronPC experience.  I told him that I’d love to get an autographed picture of Jeri Ryan.  He said he’d take care of it.  About a month later, I sent him an email reminding him of his promise and he said he had already put in the request.  I eventually did end up with an autographed picture of her but it was through another channel.  Micron went belly-up just a few years later but the color-coded plugs live on.

            My infatuation with Jeri Ryan hasn’t flagged though.  I never missed an episode of Star Trek: Voyager, I got a 6-inch figurine of Seven of Nine and placed it in a little shrine on top of my dresser in front of my autographed picture.  After Voyager went off the air, she went on to star in Boston Public.  I started watching that show just because she was on it.  I even forced myself to watch the movie Down With Love just because she was in it.  It wasn’t that bad, actually.

Jeri Ryan is just one of those people who has it all.  She is beautiful and talented; she even has a fantastic singing voice. Anyway, I’d love it if you’d ask her to participate in your show.  I’ve read that she is currently single.  Maybe she will remember me from my request for an autographed picture or my reputation as the man who got Micron to invent color-coded plugs on their PCs.  It’s worth a shot, right?